Apparently, I'm getting old...

I went to Homecoming at my alma mater last weekend and I pretty much knew I was getting old after being there.  Certainly, the reason I felt older could be that college students seem only to get younger.  But, this time it was because I found myself becoming my parents.  And here's why...

What is with writing on the back of a pair of shorts or pants?  Ladies, I offer the following observations before you don such a pair of pants.  First of all, if your ass is big enough that I can see the whole word, then you really need to reconsider calling attention to it by having something plastered on your ass.  Second, if you are a big fan of your team, what does it say about them when you decide to put them on your rear and sit on them?  I once bought toilet paper with a rival team's mascot on it with the slogan, "The only place for a [opposing team mascot] face."  Putting the team or school on your bottom doesn't communicate support or spirit.

If you love your team or school, show it by putting it on your chest.  That's something we can all enjoy.

WHAT!?!?!?!

I've stayed away from commenting on the whole Michael Vick thing. Probably because there's so much media attention on how degrading and disgusting his soon-to-be admitted actions were, I just didn't feel the need to join the chorus.

However, today I saw this article. (The article has since changed to reflect that he "backed off" the comments.)

Allow me to summarize (the original article)...

NBA star Stephon Marbury believes that all the hype about Michael Vick is overblown because, and I quote, "You know, from what I hear, dogfighting is a sport. It's just behind closed doors."

Excuse me???

First of all, I wonder if Marbury's "from what I hear" is like the "friend" people reference when they look for advice on embarrassing things. You know..."Well, I have this friend..."

Second, what kind of fucking "sport" has to be engaged in "behind closed doors?"

Third, I'd like to have someone make Marbury fight for his life for their pecuniary gain and be electrocuted or body slammed to death if they aren't up to par. After that, let's see if he thinks it's a "sport."

What a fucktard.

Oh...and on the Michael Vick thing, I'll say this: Who could have guessed that he would make Marcus the "good son?"

Actually said while shopping with the girlfriend...

Girlfriend: "Excuse me, but where are your dresses?"

Clerk: "Women's dresses?"

Me: "You sell men's dresses?"

Watching your girlfriend laugh hilariously while a clerk embarrassedly explains that there are also "misses" and "teen" dresses... Priceless.

Sittin' on the dock of the bay...

It's February, I've taken the afternoon off work and I'm sitting on my porch, listening to iTunes and blogging in 75 degree weather. Did I mention I love living in Florida?

Start your jealous/hateful/envious comments now...